Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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