My first STD was from a foam party
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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