Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
