Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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