So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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