Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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