We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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