Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
He better not be in your backpack
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
