So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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