it's great music for shaving your balls
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
my liver is dry heaving
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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