First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
