Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
she pinky promised me she was 18
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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