You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Randomize
