May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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