I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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