Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize