she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Still dying that you shit outside
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
