In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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