marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
