who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
