Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Randomize
