Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
