a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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