i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
