there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
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