Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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