You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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