This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You've changed since you got that strap on
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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