Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
