Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
