Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
