It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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