Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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