Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
