The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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