I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize