BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
is wine microwaveable?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'm too high and old for this...
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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