of course. lets lasso hookers.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize
