just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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