so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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