Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
