Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
