i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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