I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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