wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
