Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
