and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
