Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
sex in a hospital.. check
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