I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
My dick has a subreddit
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
