so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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