Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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